Almost every school has a confessions page. Filled with everything from essay-length opinion pieces to and random quirky thought, this page is often cluttered with a mismatched assortment of posts. But in between, we also see posts of students reaching out for help, people dealing with academic stress, problems at homes. A lot of students are sharing secrets they typically wouldn't reveal directly. In a judgement free zone, it feels good to release our pent up emotions under the cloak of anonymity. In fact, the idea of therapy and counseling begins with something similar to a confession. Another way that therapists recommend individuals to release their emotions is through confessional writing which can take many forms—journal writing, letters, essays, books, or poems. It turns out, there are psychological reasons why people have historically been drawn to the idea of confessing their secrets whether in religious, legal, or social contexts.
1. Alleviating mental stress - One is that we use a lot of mental capacity keeping secrets. A study showed that we are actually thinking about a secret three times more often than actively hiding it from others. This results in a cognitive burden that is associated with poorer mental and physical health (Slepian, Chun and Mason, 2017). So, just thinking about our secrets can burden us and thus decrease our motivation seen from this cognitive perspective. (Hersom)
2. Avoiding physical reprecussions - Neuroscience can explain how a secret will create conflict in the brain. By not allowing the cingulate cortex, (which is naturally wired to tell the truth) to perform its natural functions, it causes the cortex to become stressed. It will cause an increase in cortisol levels, affect memory, blood pressure, gastrointestinal tract and metabolism – all of which will affect our emotional and physical well-being (Slepian, Masicampo and Ambady, 2014). (Hersom)
3. Get advice - People confess their secrets to gain new insights into their problems to feel more postively towards their situation. (Kelly, A. E., et al. 2001)
4. Build relationships - Another dynamic we use to balance our relationships in the interpersonal system is social exchange (I tell you, you tell me). This process makes us feel that we know and understand each other better and at the same time, we show that we value the other part, and therefore we adapt to each other. (Hersom)
So what is the takeaway? Although this article is in no ways asking you to share your deepest and darkest thoughts with the world, it is highlighting some of the benefits of striving to live a more open life. Start out by utilizing confessional writing to pour out your emotions. Seek out those people in your life who you trust enough to reveal things and take it slowly step by step starting from more neutral topics. At the same time, make sure to get confirmation from the other party that they are open to listening to you. In this way, you can alleviate a lot of your mental burden and physical burden.
Citations:
"The benefits of sharing your secrets" - Christina Hersom: https://implementconsultinggroup.com/share-your-secrets/#:~:text=The%20mental%20health%20benefits%20of%20sharing%20a%20secret&text=A%20study%20showed%20that%20we,Chun%20and%20Mason%2C%202017).
Kelly, A. E., Klusas, J. A., von Weiss, R. T., & Kenny, C. (2001). What is it about Revealing Secrets that is Beneficial? Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 27(6), 651–665. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167201276002
Written By: Catherine Tang
Comentaris